FRONT PORCH FEATURE - It’s More Than a Fantasy

By Barbara Ann Temple, Ph.D.

The rising morning light over the mountain range has quietly shifted ever so slightly, day by day, over the past few weeks. 

Wildlife game trails and undulating hills hidden during the summer months are steadily emerging as sunlight creeps through the seasonal openings. 

Temperatures marked by lingering mugginess are slowly dropping by a few degrees.

All the while—inside home offices, studios, or studies filled with strewn spreadsheets, pages of highlighted notes, and computer screens crowded with innumerable statistics—a new fire is lit. Reconnections with familiar families and friends occur, excitement builds, and it’s early fall. That means it’s time for Fantasy Football—and an increased obsession with Sunday, Monday, and Thursday nights of NFL football, a season stretching across fall and into winter.

I thought I understood what fantasy football was. Five weeks into my first season, I’m discovering I’m wrong.

What amazes me most are the social interactions, the connections, the longstanding traditions, and even some interesting repercussions for losing teams–some of which might best be shared over a cup of hot cider!

One of my new friends and neighbors, Dave Chambers, has been part of the same group of friends for 20 years—and a member of The National Drunken Idiots (NDI for short) Fantasy League for 10 of those years. For non-drinkers, please don’t take offense at the name. Quick math: Dave waited 10 years to get a slot! This group is serious. The only way to earn one of its coveted ten slots is if someone quits or dies.

But the league extends far beyond those ten players. Each has a partner or best friend who joins the fun, and friends and family have become part of the extended group. After 20 years together, Dave said, “I’ll be dragged dead away from this group!”

When I asked Dave what the best part of fantasy football was that had nothing to do with winning, his answer was immediate: “The connections—real connections—we’d do anything for each other.”

He shared the story of his cousin Herb and Herb’s best friend Joe who started their fantasy football league in Florida 30 years ago. When Herb died unexpectedly years later, the entire league rallied around Dave and his cousin Ed, traveling to Florida to support them. Because Ed was too emotional to deliver the eulogy, Dave did it himself. He said the only way he made it through was by looking down at the front row and seeing his true-blue fantasy friends there, standing with them in their loss.

Today, this group is scattered across Florida, North Carolina, South Carolina, Tennessee, and even Costa Rica, but they continue to gather in person for the September Live Draft, a November party, the playoffs, and the Fourth of July. Over two decades, they’ve shared life’s ups and downs—kids, cancer, divorces, relocations, and so much more. As Dave put it, “It’s great to have a group of guys this tight who can talk about anything.”

United by fantasy football; connected through caring and commitment.

Another one of my friends and neighbors, Everett, has been playing fantasy football off and on for nearly 30 years. Most years, he’s had two leagues going—one with work friends and another with family—and he’s almost always been the manager. After taking last year off, his uncle reached out and asked if he’d manage again this year.

Fortunately, Everett said yes and began recruiting family and friends: his daughter and son in Virginia, an uncle in the Finger Lakes area of New York, a brother in Rochester, a cousin’s husband in California, and a best friend from New York who now lives in North Carolina. I’m personally happy his uncle made that call because my first Blue Ridge Beez football team has joined this crazy-fun world of social competition as part of Everett’s league.

Knowing how competitive Everett is when it comes to his Buffalo Bills, I loved hearing him chuckle when I asked about his most memorable fantasy moment. “The same uncle who got me to manage this league is a huge Bills fan, too, and I knew he wanted Josh Allen big time. So you can imagine how funny it was when the draft started. My uncle had the first pick and was going for Allen all the way—but he wasn’t there when the draft opened! I texted him, tried calling him—nothing. He literally slept through his first pick, where he would have gotten Josh Allen. He showed up maybe in the second or third round and missed his number one pick!”

For Everett, though, the real fun begins after the draft, when each manager gets to run their own team, make decisions, and watch the season unfold.

I know Dave and Everett enjoy texting, jabbing, poking, saluting, and joking with their respective league managers. But I’ve discovered that I enjoy something even better: hanging out with them. I thoroughly enjoyed sitting down with Dave over coffee, chatting about our selected players and what the season looks like so far. Equally, I loved sitting in Everett’s living room after a long day, with his dog Zeke jumping all over us, talking strategy, player selections, other teams in our league, and soaking up as much as I could about this new world of fantasy football.

As we talked, I said, "This is what it’s all about—us together, just hanging out, talking football, but really, getting to know each other a little better.”

While I don’t know all of the community members engaged in fantasy football, I do know another of my cool neighbors, Rashida, is apparently an award-winning fantasy football league manager. I was lucky enough to catch her briefly one Saturday afternoon—begging for any advice she could offer as I faced my first draft. She mentioned the simple idea of sorting my ranked player list. Little did Rashida know how helpful that veteran tip would be for this novice. I put it to work during my hyper-stressful maiden voyage into fantasy football—and earned an ESPN “A” on my first draft report card! Thank you, Rashida!

As I watch the Pisgah Forest begin to lay down for the season, the afternoon sunrays shifting differently over the backyard, I smile to myself because this fall is different for me. Even though my new football team is not off to a spectacular start after a few weeks, I’m hopeful. I’m learning a few lessons each week, but more importantly, I’m experiencing the real heartbeat of this league: making real connections with real people, connections that—if I’m lucky enough—will last a lifetime.